by Tom Kovach
Edited by Andrew Willett
When I read the New York Times article about Cesar Chavez’s abuse of Dolores Huerta and other women and girls, it landed like a ton of bricks. I walked a picket line with him a couple of years before his death, and I admired his work to uplift the lives of so many farm workers. He was a hero to me, and I could not reconcile his heroic acts with his horrific ones.
I took a walk to clear my mind, and I realized that while this news was bad enough, so was the reality of the pressure by our culture to keep quiet and to preserve an image for the good of the movement, which led to these women remaining silent for more than 50 years.
Huerta, now in her 90s, was born in a mining town called Dawson, not far from where I live. She fought for civil rights alongside her more famous counterpart. She resisted abusive systems and faced down violence on behalf of others, yet she still saw the sexual safety of her own body as being beyond reach.
This helps me realize just how important learning and practicing consent is. If as strong an individual as Dolores Huerta kept quiet, how much more likely is it for us to let sexual abuse or harassment slide? To endure instead of giving an authentic no? This is not victim-blaming—rather, it is a spotlight on how, as a society, we don’t set up individuals to be comfortable speaking up with their authentic yeses and nos.
It speaks ill of our culture that we would need to practice speaking our truth. But it is where we are, so we must practice. When Harry Faddis invented the 3-minute game for the Power, Surrender, and Intimacy workshop as a Body Electric School facilitator, it was to give us that practice. Dr. Betty Martin, an alumna of our school, saw the power of the 3-minute game and the need to expand it, and created the Wheel of Consent and the School of Consent to address this.
This is why we start our workshops talking about consent and practicing it. We recognize that our conditioning to say yes, to endure, must be overcome with agreements and practice. I cannot trust your yes unless I can trust your no. This axiom is fundamental. I was in a discussion with one of our board members, and they said that boundaries were liberating for them, because within them, they could free themselves, knowing what is okay.
At Body Electric, we often say we change the world one person at a time. Imagine if we all learned the power of our authentic yes and no. Then the culture of silence would have no refuge. April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month. Let us all practice our true consent.
The Architecture of Belonging: Building Our Body Electric School Community
Connection and community are the two things I most often read about in our workshop feedback. People share deep truths about the value they have found in meeting and developing kinship with others. It seems to me that we all arrive at a Body Electric workshop as islands. We carry our private self-doubts, our shame, and the heavy armor we’ve built to navigate a world that doesn’t always know how to hold us.
But then something shifts.
As one recent participant shared:
“Body Electric offerings help you free your body from inhibiting scripts and restrictions of your mind. You will have opportunities to risk becoming fully embodied, to know yourself in profound new ways, to be sheltered safely while opening yourself to radical change guided by wise, loving leaders. You will be surprised by gifts from courageous participants on the path with you. You can come away with powerful new skills and knowledge to enrich your life and choices. You will discover a new faith and confidence in connecting with others.“
That isn’t just a personal win; it is the foundation of our community. When we stop holding our breath, we start seeing each other. Community at Body Electric isn’t just a group of people in a room—it’s the “braver space” we build together where intimacy, erotic awakening, and acceptance can finally breathe.
As we look toward the coming year, we aren’t just looking to fill workshops; we are looking to strengthen the web that connects us between those gatherings. I often hear about relationships that have started as strangers meeting at a workshop and continue as lifelong friends. Community happens in the “in-between” moments—whether in digital spaces or at regional gatherings in places like Palm Springs, where the alumni scene is thriving—that keep the spark alive long after the workshop ends.
That’s why we are starting WhatsApp regional groups so our alumni can connect locally after the workshops. Like all of BE, it is your option to join and participate. This is something we are often asked for, and I hope you will consider taking part and staying connected.
We are also expanding our presence at Pride events this year, another opportunity to gather and support one another in difficult times. If you have ever worked a booth or marched in a Pride Parade, you know in your body what I am talking about.
Volunteering is a way of supporting and building community, as well. I honored the many volunteers who have supported the School in the December Newsletter. If you are interested in pitching in, there are many ways you can connect with others and support the School through our Volunteer Program—and particularly through our Ambassador Program.
We don’t build community just as a gimmick. We build it because the world is hungry for the kind of authenticity we practice here.
Will you help us lay the next brick?
As Within, so Without: Finding Home in the Space Between
For the longest time, I thought that fixing my relationships meant fixing how I talked, how I listened, or how I compromised. I treated intimacy like a puzzle I could solve if I just found the right pieces in someone else. But walking into a Body Electric workshop, I realized I’d been ignoring the most important person in this equation: myself.
The work doesn’t start with “us.” It starts with the quiet, often uncomfortable realization that I cannot truly see you if I am too busy hiding from myself.
In the workshop, there’s a shift that happens. We spend so much of our lives viewing our bodies as a project. But as my self-acceptance began, I realized that I am enough.
I learned that when I stop judging my own reflection, I stop bracing for your judgment. That “bracing” is what usually kills intimacy. It’s the wall I built before you even have a chance to get close. By practicing radical self-acceptance, I’m finally putting down the shield.
Through this work, as I began to offer myself loving kindness, or what the Buddhists call metta, I found I had an infinite amount more to give my partner, friends, and colleagues. When I stop being my own harshest critic, I stop being theirs, too. This foundation is what improves connection and intimacy. Relationships can be tricky when learning these things together so we have special workshops like our Couples CBE or the new deeper dive for relationships: The Space Between. This new workshop is an invitation to remember what first drew you together — and to discover what still awaits.
From the Group Circle to the Personal Journey: Meet Our Faculty Coaches
If you’ve ever walked away from a Body Electric workshop feeling a profound sense of “aliveness,” you know the magic that happens in our collective circles. But as we return to the “real world,” the question often arises: How do I keep this fire burning in my everyday life?
This is where our Faculty Coaches step in.
The Role of a Guide
Our faculty coaches aren’t just “life coaches”—they are seasoned practitioners who have walked the path of the Body Electric School. They are the keepers of our school’s ethos, specializing in the sacred intersection of somatic awareness, erotic awakening, and radical self-acceptance.
Whether you are navigating a transition, looking to deepen your relationship with pleasure, or seeking to heal old wounds, a coach acts as a steady mirror and a supportive guide. They provide the container needed for one-on-one exploration, helping you translate the workshop lessons into a personal roadmap for fulfillment.
Meet a Few of Our Guides
Our coaching roster is as diverse as our community, offering specialized support for every journey:
- For the Sacred & Embodied: Coaches like Craig Cullinane and Sarah Belzile focus on the awakening of the Sacred through pleasure, shadow work, and heart-centered communication.
- For Vulnerability & Connection: Don Shine and Mike Gee help participants bridge the gap between vulnerability and Eros, turning “not enough” into a powerful force for healing.
- For Gender & Identity-Specific Support: From JoJo Bear’s work with men’s desires to Suzanne “Frankie” Blackburn’s queer pleasure activism and Lizz Randall’s non-binary, rebellious approach to intimacy—there is a guide who truly “sees” you.
- For Trauma-Informed Healing: Coaches like Mara Roy integrate nervous-system awareness and trauma-informed care to ensure that your exploration of pleasure is grounded in safety and self-love.
Why Consider Coaching?
While a workshop is a powerful leap into new territory, coaching is the steady walk that follows. It is an investment in your own integration. It allows you to:
- Deepen the Somatic: Take the breathwork and touch practices from the workshop and refine them for your personal body-wisdom.
- Clear the Blocks: Identify the specific internal stories that keep you from being your authentic self.
- Live erotically: Move beyond sexual acts and into a life where Eros—your life-force energy—informs your career, your relationships, and your spirit.
Find Your Match
The right connection is everything. We invite you to explore the full bios of our dedicated faculty and find the person whose resonance matches your own.